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Eternia Rocks Bubble Gum

1/11/05

While out on a voyage to lands far and mysterious, I found a most interesting Flea Market by the name of Zern's. One of the first stores I encountered there was a small knickknack store filled with wonders beyond imagination. Nostalgia long forgotten and thrown away. Pieces from foreign lands. And dust-collectors you couldn't find anywhere else. While peering into a display case filled with Garbage Pail Kid goodies I noticed among them a definite treat. An unopened package of Topps Master of the Universe Eternia Rocks Bubble Gum circa 1984 for $2 a pack.

I had discovered a capricious delight, I purchased 2 packs. One of Teela, the other of He Man. Knowing full well the power they possessed, I locked them up tightly for the sanctity of my stomach. Alas, one day I could bear it no longer. The energy dwelling within them broke forth and made one last attempt at freedom. I couldn't resist, there was just something so tempting about tasting candy that was nearly as old as I am.

The poisonous venom of Teela seared through me. I could no longer stop myself. I had to taste the power of Greyskull. I expected the rocks to be mere pink chunks like hardened clumps of Big League Chew. Oh how wrong I was. They were all beautiful pastel shades in large and small polished stones. Once I bit into them, to my surprise, my teeth remained in tact. The rocks remained chewable. A feat only a Master of the Universe could attain. The flavor had lasted over 2 generations, and was, frankly, somewhat enjoyable. I could feel the intense sugar content deteriorating the gum in my mouth, leaving a cornucopia of unleashed flavor.

 

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